First love
by passing on the pixy dust
Summary: Everyone remembers their first love even Yami Bakura. A bar, internal ranting, and someone unexpected let him move on and learn to love again. Yaoi, B/YY pairing


First Love

Warnings- angst, Shounen-ai/Yaoi, mentions of Yuri and Het, moping, alcohol.

Pairing- Bakura/Yami with several side pairings mentioned.

Disclaimer- I don't own yu-gi-oh, it'd be a yaoi series if I did. Also the past timeline has no evidence in the show to support it, I made it up, it's plausible though. 

Other stuffs- Bakura PoV. 

_*_*_

You thought I wasn't watching you. I was.  Watching, tracking your every move, recording it like you held some key to life that I needed.

In a sense you did. You held my heart. 

And forever shall you hold it; because you don't feel the same. For how many millennia have I waited for you? 

Too many. 

This is a rare time for you, out with us and enjoying yourself - with him of course. That little brat. You love him don't you?

Too bad for me, too fuckin' bad, because you are the one I love- yes love. You were my first love, and a doomed one at that.

I finished my drink and got a new one, maybe the alcohol would help. But under a look of concern from Ryou I left it to sit. He cares too much, I look depressed and therefore he must fix it. 

If only it was that easy.

 I shooed him away. Back to his boyfriend. 

Ra! Does everyone but me have someone? Ryou has Malik, Joey has Marik, Isis and Mai, Ryouji and Serenity, Fuck even Tristen has that ditz Tea. Then of course Seto and the pharaoh's Brat. 

Who's left for me? No one. That's who.

Wait, the pharaoh, oh joy. I hope he's as miserable as I am. Maybe I'll seduce him for the hell of it. It'd get my mind off Him at least… 

5 millennia ago, a priest captured my naive heart and lured me to help his cause. Even after manipulating me I couldn't learn to hate him. He was my first love. That one that sticks in your mind til you die. Except I'll never die. I'll remember forever.

Fuck forever, Fuck life, Fuck Seto, Ra! Everyone should just leave me alone - people cause pain. I don't like pain.

Unless I'm causing it of course.

Nice thought, maybe I can go kill someone once this is all done. That'd be fun.

He looks happy. Each smile bringing another stab to me barely existent heart.  I don't care for much - except him. I was a fool when I feel in love, just a child. And I never got over it. Damn my memory, why can't I just forget? 

Why can't he just go away?

I don't really want him to though; no matter how much it hurts me I do want him to be happy. Damn conscience or whatever the hell this is making me feel this. Damn heart. Damn world. Damn Seto, damn hikari and his boyfriend, damn- 

"Bakura?"

I looked to see who had interrupted my internal rant. 

Oh him.

"What pharaoh?"

"You're staring at Seto." He said as he slid onto the barstool next to me.

"I am not."

"Don't lie you were never good at it."

"First off I am a superb liar and second I was not watching Seto."

"Liar."

"If I was, what's it too you?"

He shrugged, "Human interest." But his eyes gave him away; it was more.

" Now you're the liar, why else?"

" No reason." He shifted in his seat.

He was getting nervous, intriguing - I pried further; "Why the interest Yami? You're being like Ryou." I chuckled softly and waited for his answer.

 Silence.

" C'mon it's not like you love me or anything; fess up, Did Ryou put you up to this?" as I faced him I got my answer.

The shock and fear on his face.

Oh Ra, I hit something.

But he couldn't…? Love, _Me_ …Could he..?

Great now I'm more confused than before. 

"Yami…say something." Getting him to talk was key, I had to know if he… 

" I'm an idiot." He said laying his head in his arms on the bar.

"Possibly, But we'll ignore that. Pharaoh do you…?" I couldn't bring myself to say it.

He closed his eyes - what a response. I gritted my teeth; Ra he is a stubborn ass. Given I knew that already but still, annoying none the less.

"Considering you being silent tells me everything you might as well just say it."

Silence.

"Fine then, I'll just go if you have nothing to say." I started to get up, timing in my head…5…4…3…2…1. And-

"Stay, I'll talk."

Bingo. 

"Then go." I said sitting down again.

And he didn't speak.

"I think this silence thing is a disease with you." I said smirking.

"Could you try to at least a little considerate Bakura?" he said.

Well fine then, "Go ahead, I'll be quiet."

"Thank you."

My turn to be silent as I waited for him to start.

Still waiting.

" He doesn't love you Bakura, we both know it. And I may not know the past but you've hinted enough that there was something there. You have to move on. 5 thousand years is enough to mourn with, start a new life. We've been given a second chance here. Why dwell on the past with it?"

" Look, don't judge on what you haven't experienced. "

"I'm not."

I raised an eyebrow at this.

"Yes Bakura, I've been in your position."

"Yugi right?"

"No, not Yugi."

"So who then?"

 He smiled slightly; "My secret that."

" Alright than, so why the concern for me?"

"You're suffering needlessly."

"And it's my purgative to do so."

"True. It is. But why mourn when you can celebrate?"

"And what Pharaoh do I have to celebrate, I am alone, hated, and feared. What do I have to celebrate?"

" I don't hate you."

"And what's that one of how many? Nice sentiment but no need to lie."

" I'm not lying to you."

" Well great."

"Bakura?"

"What?"

"I do like you."

I look at him, the pharaoh looks rather defenseless at the moment, he was asking me permission to say anymore. I internally smirk at the thought. 

He looks sweet sitting there.

Did I just call him 'sweet'...?…uh huh I did. Damn.

I took another look, physically he's nice, thin but not skinny, defiantly appealing, but what do I think of him as a person?

Yes surprise, personality does count for something. 

Well I don't know what I feel at the moment but I suddenly have the urge to kiss him. How odd.

And so I do. He stiffened immediately then relaxed a bit, it was just a chaste kiss, but I felt a little more than I thought I would have by the action.

I pulled away after a few seconds and we just looked at each other. I vaguely noticed the stare or two we'd gotten from those around us.

  "Bakura..?" Yami said timidly, " Why..?"

"I wanted to." Not a lie at least I did want to kiss him, wow things have gotten weird fast.

Yami gave a nod as he faced forward, staring at the wall.

Did I mention he looks hot?

Something's wrong with me, why the hell am I thinking these things? And about the Pharaoh no baka of all beings! Rule one of my life don't involve yourself with people - it hurts too much I learned that early on.

And yet I'm sitting here just having kissed the pharaoh. No Yami. 

His name is Yami. 

Why the hell did I kiss him? 

It was nice too. Very nice. 

Maybe I should kiss him again.

NO! Bad thought. What's gotten into me?!

I grab the glass of alcohol and drink - hey at least if I get drunk I can blame anything that happens on the alcohol. 

Wow I'm pathetic. But hey I don't really care at the moment. Bottoms up!

I set the glass down as I finished it. Ra tell me I'm being delusional again and that the pharaoh is not next to me and I did not kiss him.

Shit he is. Why can't I ever be dreaming when I actually want to?

I sighed. This is a situation I never saw myself in. Yet here I am. 

How quaint.

" Are we just going to sit here and pretend that didn't happen or talk?" Yami said softly not making eye contact.

I started to think. " We should probably talk..."

With that the silence falls again. We're both too chicken to start - how great.

I took in the sight of Yami, he looked so dejected and uncomfortable, I want to hold him and…

Did I just think that?

Yeah I really did. He looks so helpless, which is strange he's usually the picture of egotism and strength; I've never seen him like this before.

I like it too, I like it a lot.

I decide to break the silence; "So… I guess… well…. okay fine I don't know what to say, you?"  Ra that was lame.

" I don't know what to say either...what is there to say even? ... I mean we both feel something I guess…"

"Something… Ra knows what."

"Yeah…"

Silence.

"So what do we do now?" He asked, surprising me by talking this much to me.

We look at each other again. He has beautiful eyes.

I leaned in for another kiss, a little longer this time. A little more of everything.

His cheeks tinged pink as we pulled apart.

 I felt a smile pass my face, he had one too.

" That was nice."

I nod not knowing what to say or if I'll be able to form coherent words for that matter.

" What do you think of me Bakura?"

"Huh..?" that's an odd question.

" Is this just to forget Seto or do you feel something?"

My turn for the silence, I thought, did I feel something?

"I do Yami."

"You didn't call me pharaoh."

"What disappointed?"

"No; very glad." He smiled.

This time he initiated the kiss, the need was greater, I took control and played with his bottom lip and then I pushed my tongue past, ravaging his sweet mouth. But he fought, he didn't just submit, though I won in the end. I slipped an arm around him and pulled him closer to me; this was bliss.

That time we were almost panting by the time we pulled apart. 

" Hey Bakura why don't we get out of here?" Yami breathed.

"Sounds great."

We lifted ourselves off of the stools and started to leave.

And who caught my eye?

Seto, Seto and Yugi.

I was tempted to glare but I felt and arm snake around my waist and Yami pulled close.

I gazed at him, beautiful. Then to Seto. 

You know what? It doesn't hurt so much, I have someone too now. I know I'll never really hate Seto but I can move on, new love and all?

…I just said love.

Love.

Do I love Yami?

We start walking out, saying good-bye to everyone Ryou smiled, I wonder if he planned this.

Then I look at Yami. It's so odd, if someone had told me yesterday this would happen I would have called the nuthouse. 

But now…

Now it didn't seem so odd, holding him like this as we walked felt so right.

I feel loved.

Finally someone that loves me back.

How long did that take now?

5,000 years?

Oh well. 

A smile played on my lips, as we walked. This was good. Maybe I was wrong about cutting people off.

Looking at Yami I wondered if maybe cutting myself off was what had hurt me, He looked so beautiful and his body close to me felt divine. 

He smiled at me.

Yeah, I could get used to this.

Very used to this.

_*_*_ 

Owari.

Cute fluffy yaoi. I love Bakura and Yami they're so cute together.

Bakura- you just called me 'cute' are you on drugs again?

I don't think so…. I'll get back to you on that.

Bakura- yeah you're on drugs…I'm not cute, I'm evil.

Yami- sure you're cute. You're like a bunny.

Everyone- O.o 

Yami-the kind that just got run over by a car and the highway patrol has to clean up. *Smirk*

Bakura- Die. Pharaoh. * Chase*

-_-;; Oh well. Review please! *Shoves Ryou w/ puppy eyes in front of everyone* come on and review or you'll make Ryou sad, we can't have that now.


End file.
